WhatsApp Status
I went to a seafood disco last week and pulled a muscle.
It’s the little things you do that mean the most to me.
Virginity can be cured.
You fall in love, you get hurt. That’s life.
It costs $0.00 to be a decent person.
Sometimes you have to lose the battle to win the war.
I broke up with my gym. We were just not working out.
Deal with your problems before they deal with your happiness.
My life can be measured in hours
I don’t insult people , I just describe them.
Love me or hate me I’m still gonna shine.
A party without cake is just a meeting.
Life is Short – Chat Fast!
Don’t be voilent be silent and show your talent..
I’d far rather be happy than right.
No guts, no glory, no brain, same story
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me.
How do you occupy an idiot? Press down – Press up…Press Down…!
I got less but i got best!
I’d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
I’d far rather be happy than right.
The person who hates you, loves you the most..
Hi-ho, hi-ho, it’s hand grenades I throw.
So many assume. So few know.
I have the simplest tastes.
Be you !!! The world will adjust.
A ring is round & has no end, that’s how long I’ll be your friend.
regular naps prevent old age.. expecially if u take them while driving.
If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong.
He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.
I’m not tense, jst terribly, terribly alert.
May I go to the toilet = I’m fucking bored.
Life is a game, let’s make a high score.
A smiling face always has a painful heart.
Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
I am always satisfied with the best.
I’m not actually this tall. I am sitting on my wallet.
We repair what your husband fixed.
God must love stupid people. He made SO many.
Comparison is the thief of joy.
The other teams could make trouble for us if they win.
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.
I’d give my right arm to be ambidextrous.
If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.
Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.
Age is strictly a case of mind over matter.
My first name and your last name would sound great together.
If you cannot change your mind, you are sure you have one.
Faces YOU Make ON The Toilet
I can resist everything except temptations
I don’t suffer from stress. I’m a carrier
Save water drink beer.
LIFE – LOVE = ZERO
Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.
The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.
GIRL: Describe me in 1 word. —- BOY: Mine
Thin, I am quick; fat, I am slow.
Always remember you are unique just like every one else.
Loyal females DESERVE the best. Remember that ?
When I close my eyes, I see you …. when I open my eyes, I miss you.
Who am I?
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back.
Yeah. I’m a badass.
I say this; I say that, what the hell you want to listen from me?
I’ll be yours forever, just tell me when to start.
Smile today, tomorrow could be worse.
Time is precious, waste it wisely.
Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
Expectation Brings Tears In Your Life.
I work for money, For loyalty Hire a Dog.
If you want to be rude then you should become a celebrity.
Loving you is like breathing How can I stop?
Real men stay dedicated to only one girl!
Be Careful As I Draw You I Can Delete You.
I need Six months of vacation, Twice a year.
Busy Planning For A Miracle.
Crowded elevators smell different to midgets.
Home Is Where The Heart Is.
When I write Etc., it means End of Thinking Capacity
I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
I Can’t See Myself Without You.
Do unto others before they do unto you.
Of course I’m not perfect; there’s a crack in my ass!
Hey Mate…you There…Whatsapp is using me.
Etc= End of thinking Capacity.
Only Marriage is the major cause of divorce.
You’re never too old to learn something stupid.
If you are player then I’m the GAME.
Some people call me Mike, You can call me tonight
If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is not for you!
Do You Want To Go Out With Me? (A) Yes (B) A (C) B.
I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.
I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
Behind this smile is everything you’ll never understand.
I hate math but I love counting money.
When in doubt, mumble.
There’s always a person that you hate for no reason.
The greatest achievement is to outperform yourself.
Men speak less at home as wives are good with knives.
Live out of your imagination, not your history.
Virginity is like a soapbubble, one prick and it is gone.
Mistakes are good, but improved mistakes is success.
I like to take road less travelled…..helps me to avoid traffic.
Can’t remember to forget you..
Yes, I’m smiling. But you’re not the reason anymore.
Whatsapp status is loading.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
Waiting for wi-fi network.
Not always available, try your luck
Take Life, one cup at a time!
Smile and others will smile back
Train your mind to see good in everything.
Take out N out of friend, and you are cooked
Just remember…if the world didn’t suck, we’d all fall off.
Hard work has a future payoff.
having 1 child makes you a parent having two makes you a referee.
History is made by those who BREAK THE RULES.
I can resist everything except temptation.
Insanity is my only means of relaxation
Evil is obvious only in retrospect.
